A letter to my future-self

A part of the book "Discipline Psychology"

Dear Future Me,

I write to you with trembling hands because I know how easy it is to forget. I know how noise drowns truth, how comfort numbs the soul, how excuses grow into walls. I am afraid you might drift with all the glamour the world has to offer, that you might hide under the illusion of “tomorrow,” or sell your life for comfort that betrays you.

So this is not just a letter.

This is a reminder.

A rope to hold on to when everything else feels slippery.

You and I once believed in later. We believed in “I’ll start tomorrow” as if tomorrow was owed to us. We delayed prayers, postponed apologies, left dreams untouched.

We thought delay was harmless. But Allah shattered that illusion with His timeless words:

“By time, indeed mankind is in loss, except those who believe and do righteous deeds, and advise each other to truth, and advise each other to patience.” (Qur’an 103:1–3)

Time is not a friend.

It is a witness.

And every heartbeat you waste in hesitation is a witness against you. Future me, remember: you do not own tomorrow.

Discipline is not your prison. It is your freedom. It was never meant to suffocate you, but to save you. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) reminded us that greatness is not in grand gestures, but in steady steps:

“The most beloved of deeds to Allah are those that are consistent, even if they are few.” (Bukhari & Muslim)

Do not despise small acts, future me.

Every prayer on time, every temptation resisted, every quiet word of kindness was a seed. When watered daily, these seeds became a garden. But if you abandon them, if you break your promises, the garden turns to desert. Guard the seeds, even when no one is watching. Especially when no one is watching.

And when hardship presses against your chest, do not think it is because you have been forgotten. The weight is not a curse, it is a sign. The Messenger of Allah, Muhammad (peace be upon him) reminded us that trials are not random storms, but chosen tests for the ones He loves most:

“When Allah loves a servant, He tests him.” (Tirmidhi)

So let the struggle wrap you, not as rejection, but as proof you are seen. Pain is not abandonment. It is preparation. It is Allah’s way of polishing what He loves, of shaping you for a strength you cannot yet imagine.

Remember when the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) himself felt the silence of revelation, when the weight of loneliness and despair almost broke him? Allah answered with Surah Duha, verses of comfort that echo to every aching heart:

“And your Lord will give you, and you will be satisfied.” (Qur’an 93:5)

If even the Messenger (peace be upon him) was gently reassured, then what about you? Silence is not absence. Delay is not neglect. Struggle is not rejection. It is love dressed as hardship. All the Prophets and Messengers went through severe struggles, Allah mentioned:

“Or do you think that you will enter Paradise while such [trial] has not yet come to you as came to those who passed away before you? They were afflicted with suffering and adversity and were shaken until [even] the Messenger and those who believed with him said, ‘When is the help of Allah?’ Unquestionably, the help of Allah is near.” (Qur’an 2:214)

So, never doubt the mercy of Allah, no matter what you did, always return to Him with a humble heart believing that Allah will not return you empty handed.

And to soothe your trembling heart, Allah sealed His promise with repetition, so you would never doubt:

“Indeed, with hardship comes ease. Indeed, with hardship comes ease.” (Qur’an 94:5–6)

Pain is not abandonment.

It is preparation. Struggle is not punishment. It is carving resilience into your bones. Sacrifice is not loss. It is exchange. Allah described it not as deprivation but as a trade:

“Indeed, Allah has purchased from the believers their lives and their properties [in exchange] for Paradise.” (Qur’an 9:111)

So when you give, when you restrain, when you walk away from comfort for His sake, do not call it loss. Call it investment.

Future me, beware of the velvet chains of comfort. How many times it whispered: “Rest longer. Delay more. You deserve ease.” But Allah pulled back the curtain and warned you:

“But you prefer the worldly life, while the Hereafter is better and more enduring.” (Qur’an 87:16–17)

Do not let comfort trick you into slavery. The only true rest is in His remembrance:

“Unquestionably, by the remembrance of Allah hearts find rest.” (Qur’an 13:28)

And remember how sins once seemed small, almost weightless. But each one left a shadow. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said every sin leaves a black spot on the heart until repentance polishes it away. Do not delay repentance, future me. Every “later” adds weight, every postponement deepens the stain. Repent early. Repent often. Repent now.

And what of your emotions? They once controlled you. Anger turned you reckless, sadness hollowed you, fear paralyzed you. But even the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) wept when his son Abraham died. He did not deny grief; he sanctified it with surrender:

“The eyes shed tears and the heart grieves, but we will not say except that which pleases our Lord.” (Bukhari)

Future me, feel your emotions but never let them chain you. Anchor them in faith. Grief is proof of love. Fear is a reminder to seek Allah’s shelter. Joy is mercy from Him.

And when your prayers feel like whispers into silence, when you think Allah has turned away, remind yourself: silence is not absence. Allah has always been near. His promise has always stood:

“And whoever relies upon Allah, then He is sufficient for him.” (Qur’an 65:3)

Delay is never neglect. Every unanswered prayer is a protection, a redirection. Every hardship is a teacher. Every delay is preparation. Trust Him more than you trust your plans. We plan a lot of things, but in the end life follows the script written by Allah.

And never forget legacy.

One day, your name will be spoken in the past tense. People will sit in a room heavy with silence, and you will no longer be there. What will remain then? Allah told you:

“Indeed, We record that which they send before them, and their footprints.” (Qur’an 36:12)

Your wealth will scatter. Your possessions will fade. But your kindness, your patience, your prayers, your words of truth, these will remain as your footprints on the earth.

Future me, leave behind light, not noise.

Do not cling to what perishes. Give before it is taken. Allah reminded you of the price of righteousness:

“Never will you attain righteousness until you spend [in the way of Allah] from that which you love.” (Qur’an 3:92)

And above all, remember death.

Do not let it become an abstract thought. Let it sit in your chest like a heartbeat. Allah told you with clarity that leaves no escape.

“Every soul shall taste death, and you will only be given your full compensation on the Day of Resurrection. So he who is drawn away from the Fire and admitted to Paradise has attained [his desire].” (Qur’an 3:185)

One day, your breath will stutter. Your body will return to the dust. And only your deeds will follow you into the grave. On that day, excuses will not speak. Only truth will.

So live honestly.
Pray sincerely.
Work consistently.
Sacrifice willingly.
Avoid sins fiercely.
Love deeply.
Trust Allah endlessly.

And when you stand before your Lord, may your lips tremble not with “I wish” but with “Alhamdulillah (All praise is for Allah), I lived.”

With trembling hope,

Me.